A Prayer For Humility

Mighty God and gentle Lamb, Lord of all creation
How we long to know You, how we strive to serve You
Help us now to love You even more

Give us humble hearts to praise You,
and listening ears to hear Your voice,
wiling hands to serve You,
thankful spirits to rejoice.
Lord of all, we adore You
and we bring this prayer before You.
Create in us, humble hearts

When our thoughts turn proud,
remind us of the grace You freely give
When we lose our way, Lord find us
draw us close to You again.

Amen. 

-Mark Patterson-

Face It

English is a common subject since we was at school. Besides learn English at school, I ever took English course when I was a child. I still remember, I went to the course place by ‘bemo’ and paid five hundred IDR at that time (Now, the rate is two thousand and five hundred IDR). Then I ever studied too at Eloquence, Green Garden area, together with children (daughter and son) of my parent’s friend. I walked to their house, me with their driver picked up the girl and boy at their school then went to Eloquence.

English, for me is such a scary thing. In course class, I afraid can’t answer question. The same thing happened at high school, I afraid can’t fill the blank missing lyric of a song and answer question after watching a movie in Conversation Lab Class. My English was so weak at that time.

Then I studied at UPH (Pelita Harapan University) which well-known as global campus and most of intermediate language using English. Though I was in regular class, but books we used are in English. To be graduated from UPH, the students should get the score of IELTS (International English Language Test System) minimal 45 from 120. We should take the test, search place that have IELTS and paid by ourselves. In curriculum, there is IBT subject to prepare students for IELTS. But for some of my friends, only learn from the class is not enough. They took private course, their teacher was the best graduated student from UPH who got the IELTS score 112/120. I know my financial condition couldn’t let me took private course as like as my friends. They should pay around two millions for ten meetings (if I don’t wrong remember the story from my friends). So the solution and strategies I could do:

1. Pay attention and be serious in IBT (Internet-Based Test) class, do all tasks and review lessons that given by lecturer
2. I bought some DVDs and set the subtitle in English, and every time I found the vocabulary I didn’t know, wrote it down and found out the meaning in dictionary

Me between my other four friends, took the test by myself which near from my area, West Jakarta. I went there alone, tried to find out how to get there by public transportation (near the test area, I have passed too far, so I should took another ‘angkot’ in reverse direction). After the test finished, on my way to home at ‘bemo’, I really feel want to cry. I afraid couldn’t pass the score needed. I afraid should take the test again and it mean I should pay again for amount $165. I don’t want be a burden for my sibling to pay so much if I failed.

When the score has released, I was like shocked for the score I got. It’s far beyond what I guess because I thought I will failed. Many part of the test I can’t answer. And between my friends who took private course, I got higher score than them. I am not proud of, just think they might be got better score than me because they have practiced more. I really give thanks.

Since then, I am not as scared as before again with English. I even choose article, listen the video, and set movie subtitle in English. And if I found unknown vocabulary, I search the meaning. I do that in aim to improve my English. I still on the process of learning and never stop to learn.

Last but not least, I learn that to paralyse the things we scared of, we should interlocked with them often as possible. Not to run away, but face it.

-YoeL-

Membaca

Sejak kecil kita sudah belajar membaca. Orang yang terlahir dalam keluarga dengan budaya suka membaca dan didikan akan pentingnya membaca akan menuruni hobi membaca itu. Namun tidak demikian halnya dengan saya. Orang tua saya tidak, kakak-kakakku tidak, dan saya pun tidak.

Saat sekolah di Amitayus, saya punya seorang teman yang wawasannya sangat luas. Ia tahu banyak hal tentang sejarah, politik dan berita-berita yang kurun terjadi. Hal tersebut dikarenakan ia suka membaca buku dan koran. Saat itu saya sadar betapa pentingnya membaca. Saya mencoba untuk  belajar darinya, berlangganan koran, paksa diri untuk membaca walaupun tidak suka. Ternyata tidak tahan dalam waktu yang lama.

Memasuki SMA, saya dikelilingi orang-orang yang hobi membaca. Pentingnya membaca sekali lagi diingatkan. Sejak saat itu saya mulai paksa diri membaca. Membeli buku, meng-highlight kalimat-kalimat penting dengan stabilo. Bukan buku text book tentunya, saya bukan tipe kutu buku.. hehehe..  Awalnya adalah buku-buku bertemakan iman dan kepercayaan Kristen. Lalu berlanjut dengan buku komedi dan novel. Pengarang favorit untuk buku komedi, Raditya Dika dan novel, Paulo Coelho.

Lambat laun saya menikmati rasa dan aroma dari buku. Kini jumlah buku yang saya miliki masih berjumlah sedikit dibandingkan orang-orang yang jumlah bukunya hingga ratusan atau bahkan ribuan. Ratusan pun belum ada. Namun bila flashback lagi bagaimana saya dulunya dan melihat sekarang, bagi saya jumlah yang dimiliki saat ini sudah bisa dikatakan lumayan.

Mengisi hari libur, saya mencoba mengupdates data "My Library.xls". Dan juga dalam website www.goodreads.com yang saya sudah buat sejak bulan Januari, namun belum diisi apa-apa. :D Cukup menyenangkan. Saya jadi tahu jumlah buku yang dimiliki, yang sudah terbaca, dan yang belum (akan) habis dibaca.

Sejak bulan Agustus hingga sekarang, muatan kerja saya di kantor lumayan padat. Sepulangnya sampai di rumah sudah tepar. Akhir pekan biasanya olahraga bulutangkis bersama teman-teman. Beberapa bulan kemarin yaitu September dan Oktober juga banyak menghadiri undangan pernikahan di akhir pekan. Saya sempat vakum membaca. Dan entah mengapa, semingguan ini kerinduan membaca itu menghampiri. Ditambah lagi rangsangan untuk mencari tahu dan memperdalam bidang saya tentang perhotelan. Semoga bukan hanya hasrat sesaat, tapi spirit belajar lewat membaca tidak sirna. Keep reading, YoeL! =)

My Library ^_^

Disappointed

no need other to tell
just listen to the heart
and the eyes
enough to know

I know you know I know you know I know.
-YoeL-

Keluguan Hati

Karena telah menjalani hidupnya sepenuh-penuhnya,

rerumputan yang kering gersang 

tetap menarik perhatian orang-orang yang berlalu lalang.

Bunga-bunga sekadar berbunga,

Dan ini mereka lakukan sebaik-baiknya.

Bunga lili putih yang mekar tak terlihat di lembah,

Tak butuh menjelaskan dirinya pada siapa-siapa;

Dia hidup hanya demi keindahan.

Namun kata "hanya" itu tak diterima manusia.

Andai tomat-tomat ingin menjadi melon,

Betapa menggelikannya.

Heran sungguh saya melihat,

Begitu banyak orang ingin menjadi yang bukan diri mereka;

Apa gunanya menjadikan diri sendiri bahan tertawaan?

Tak perlu kita selalu berpura-pura tangguh,

Tak guna membuktikan sepanjang waktu 

bahwa semuanya baik-baik saja,

Usahlah memikirkan apa kata orang,

Menangislah kalau perlu,

Menumpahkan air mata itu baik

(sebab hanya dengan begitu kita akan bisa tersenyum lagi).

-Mitsuo Aida-

Teaching

Yesterday I was in charge on behalf the pastry chef who couldn't come and teach. I gave pastry class briefing for first semester students. Explain to them about grooming, rules and equipments. It was my first time talking in front of 26 students for one hour. In the end of class, I felt so thirsty. Luckily, the class was under my control. Their attitude was good. Finally, I could understand how is the feeling to be a lecture. I think, it's not just need the knowledge, skill or experience. "It's need the strategy also to control the voice while giving lecturing," said Mr. Nonot to me.

Last night, I've got message from another lecturer that she has leave day for today. She asked me to be in charge in her class and teach about the introduction of housekeeping supplies and material. She gave me the choice also if I'm not confidence, just check the students' grooming and check list their attendance. I asked her back, "Is it should be in english? My english is not so good, if I can speak in Bahasa then I'll try to give  them the introduction." Then she replied it's OK in Bahasa. So, this morning I prepared it. Before the class, Mr. Nonot remind me that teaching consist of three parts: opening, content and closing. He gave me the examples how to give opening, how to make two ways interaction with students and how to close the class meeting. I tried to apply his advices in these two days while I taught in the housekeeping class. Thanks a lot Pak Noy! ^_^

Tomorrow, I should give the same briefing of pastry class as like yesterday to another class. Hope I could improve better. 

I won't consider these three days as a burden, but as an opportunity for me to learn and grow up. Try to think positively in every situation that given. 

Happy teaching! =D

"It's not that I'm smarter than them, but I learned and experienced before, so I share it."

-YoeL-

on my FO desk

Knots

The range of what we think and do

is limited by what we fail to notice.

And because we fail to notice

that we fail to notice

there is little we can do

to change

until we notice

how failing to notice

shapes our thoughts and deeds.

-R. D. Laing-